Thursday, December 16, 2004
oh god these few days is soooooo like tennis days....and all the people i hang out are from tennis.i've become kinda close to sheryldine and she told me this biggest secret (well actually i ask her about it as i have my doubts and she just answer them).and yesterday i had a well chat with jacynthia so i think everything it's like totally well now....sigh....it has being such a long time since i had such a smooth day...honestly speaking i had like totally crappy days the past few weeks...but it's days like today that makes living worthwhile.
and that johny is like not pestering me anymore...seriously i've told him plenty of time to give me more time to get over everything and yet he wouldn't...so what else can i do but to avoid him...i dun wanna do this man but it just comes like automatically.and i am really scared of him that i don't even dare to smile at him.And i realise he has like super super big strength.cause that day he pull me to pass me the written piece of paper and he was like grabbing me by the arm.in fact actually guys really do seem to have more strength.i used to think that i am as strong as any other guy but obviously it's all in my imagination.so therefore i conclude that guys are indeed strong enough to rape a girl....okie that sounds so wrong,weird and crude...but seriously i used to think that oh bullshit man how is it possible that a guy can like force upon a girl who has like equal strength and blah blah....how terribly ignorant of me!sometimes my friends say i have weird perceptions and thinking and i guess from this i can kinda understand what they have being going through.
okie i have a mini confession to make....that is i think i like someone already..i think he likes me too(or maybe he is just attracted to me).but honestly it's just a good feeling nothing too deep yet...time will tell if we are meant for each other....but still i get a bit excited when i think about the days i'll be seeing him but i think it's only due to that and the trainings that we got kinda a bit more closer.I told my girlfriends(xiu xia,stella and lili) and they seem kinda excited for me and they feel that he might have some sort of interest in me too....hohhohohoh.yippe.
oh have i mention.....i think tennis totally rocks and i just wanna make it big like to the school team and all that....and today we had a really intense training cause only four of us turn up:me,sheryldine,tobais,jeffery.so coach was able to like give us a one to one rectifying our mistake...and apparently my main problem is that i am not so flexible and i gotta get my legs moving(like shuffle them back and forward instead of taking big steps and stretch my hands to hit the ball)and i told the coach it's a habit like for me to take one big step and he kinda flare up totally and say with his stern tone and look:honestly this is just an excuse if u don't wanna change it then i can seriously tell you this is how far you can go.then forget about making to the team and blah blah(basically a lot of scoldings) .and he ask me to work on my limitations.so my main concern is tennis then drama and then weiqi....i think i am really prepared to give up my post as the secretary if my tennis needs more commitment in the future.
and my whole body frm the scalp onwards hurts cause of the intense training under the hot sun this week....my hands and legs and scalp are like cooked crab colour-really deep red and needless to say it totally hurts man.so NEXT WEEK ONWARDS I'M GONNA COVER MYSELF TOTALLY WITH SUNBLOCK LOTION.or else i might die of skin cancer or watever before i even make it to the team.
Y 11:18 PM
